Table of contents:
- Extreme shyness in adults: symptoms
- Physical symptoms
- Behavioral symptoms
- Cognitive symptoms
- Causes of extreme shyness in adults
- Consequences of being extremely shy
- Treatment for extreme shyness in adults
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Being a shy person is not as bad as it seems, even having a shy behavior could be considered a virtue when shyness is moderate. In general, shy people tend to be more respectful, trustworthy and formal people in social interaction. Moderate shyness does not prevent a person from enjoying life and moving towards their goals and objectives, nor does it have to lack self-esteem. However, there are people whose shyness becomes extreme to the point of preventing them from having a good quality of life, relating to the people they want, they feel incapable of achieving their personal goals, they have very low self-esteem, among other things that lead them also to isolate themselves from others. This type of extreme shyness, which is extremely negative, in psychology is considered a social phobia.Social phobia is a psychological disorder that is located within the group of anxiety disorders and is considered one of the most common disorders.
In this Psychology-Online article about extreme shyness in adults: symptoms and treatment, we are going to know what are the symptoms of an adult who suffers from extreme shyness or social phobia, what are its causes, what consequences this can bring to people and your treatment.
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- Causes of extreme shyness in adults
- Consequences of being extremely shy
- Treatment for extreme shyness in adults
Extreme shyness in adults: symptoms
The adults with extreme shyness or social phobia have a number of common symptoms when they are interacting with others, which we describe below:
Physical symptoms
- Tachycardia.
- Facial flushing
- Excessive sweating
- Gastrointestinal upset.
- Shaking of voice and / or hands.
- Muscle tension.
- Tics.
Behavioral symptoms
- Avoidance and / or flight from social situations where they think they can make a fool of themselves or be made fun of.
- They can adopt behaviors designed to hide their anxiety when they are faced with some social interaction. For example, they tend to let other people speak more than they do, to plan in advance what they are going to say or do in a certain situation, they can consume alcohol to disinhibit themselves, etc.
- They tend to adopt security measures to protect themselves from any possible social ridicule. For example, they can wear dark clothing so that they do not sweat, not write in front of other people, not talk on the phone in front of other people, etc.
Cognitive symptoms
- They have negative thoughts and beliefs about themselves.
- They focus a lot on themselves.
- They become obsessed with the possible consequences that their behavior can have and consider them catastrophic.
- They impose personal rules and norms on themselves that are grossly exaggerated. since they demand too much. When they cannot carry them out, they constantly criticize themselves.
- They may have a hard time concentrating and finding the right words when talking to one or more people.
Causes of extreme shyness in adults
Extreme shyness or social phobia usually appears in childhood or adolescence suddenly after a humiliating or extremely stressful experience for the person.
For a person's shyness to become extreme, leading to a social phobia, some factors must be present, such as the following:
- Biological vulnerability: Scientific research has been found indicating that this disorder can be inherited.
- Psychological vulnerability: refers to everything that the person has learned throughout life, which determines the way in which they perceive difficult situations and how to deal with them. This way of perceiving life and personality is based on the parenting style that has been received, life experiences, etc. For example, if a person throughout his life has experienced constant negative social situations such as teasing, rejection, intimidation, marginalization, etc., he is more likely to become a shy person, which if not corrected in time, more Later it can be triggered into extreme shyness. On the other hand, the lack of social contact prevents the person from adequately developing their social skills. Regarding parenting style, it has been found that children of overprotective parents,too demanding and not at all affectionate, they are more likely to develop extreme shyness or social phobia.
- Irrational beliefs: when throughout his life the person has developed a series of negative and irrational beliefs about himself and the way of perceiving the world. For example, thinking that you always have to please everyone, that in order to fit into society you have to be almost perfect, that it is better not to say anything so as not to be wrong, that you have no right to make mistakes, etc.
Consequences of being extremely shy
When an adult suffers from extreme shyness or social phobia, they live limited and it is impossible for them to have a meaningful life due to the negative consequences that this type of disorder brings with it.
By avoiding the dreaded social situations, the problem only increases more and more, so the person runs the risk of being totally isolated from others. All this can bring with it major problems such as depression and other types of disorders that, if not addressed in time, can increase in severity. So it is worth making an effort to start a treatment, solve this situation and not allow this problem to become even more limiting.
Treatment for extreme shyness in adults
Extreme shyness in adults or social phobia should be treated by a mental health professional. The person who suffers from it should be evaluated so that the treatment that best suits their individual needs is applied.
In most cases, only psychotherapy is necessary, however, sometimes it can be combined with the use of drugs such as antidepressants or anxiolytics, which are only to alleviate the symptoms, by themselves they do not solve the problem.
The therapy that has proven to be very effective in overcoming extreme shyness in adults is cognitive-behavioral therapy.The main objective of this therapy is to inform the patient through psychoeducation all about this type of phobia, modify their beliefs and irrational thoughts that are preventing them from relating in the way they want to with others and achieving their personal goals, changing them for more positive and adaptive ones. As well as eliminating those avoidance and flight behaviors that it presents in the face of feared social situations and gradually getting used to it through relaxation techniques and exposure to this type of social encounter. To do this, they are also taught a series of skills so that you can feel more secure when interacting with other people.
You may also be interested in reading our article on how to help a shy and insecure child.
This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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