How to act with a person after having sex?

It has happened to many people that they do not know very well how to act after spending the night with someone. There are those who think that if you write to him it will seem that he is too aware of the other person, on the contrary, there are those who despair waiting for a message that never arrives and thinking about everything that may have happened so as not to have any sign of the other person. In any case, unless it has been established very very well previously how it will be a posteriori (and even so, we all know that in sentimental matters there is never an exact science) it can be a reason for uncertainty how to act after having relationships, that is why in this article on Psychology-Online we are going to give 8 keys to know how to act depending on the situation in which you find yourself.

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1. Give and ask for feedback
2. Reflect
3. Ask for privacy
4. Calibrate the situation
5. Practice empathy
6. Take initiative
7. Give space
8. To clear doubts

Give and ask for feedback

A good way to act after having relationships is to ask for feedback on how you have felt in an assertive and fluid way and listen to the other person about it. Asking for feedback is not going to do anything serious or wanting to straighten things out (although the topic may come up in the conversation) but simply talking about sex and the relationship you have had openly. This favors trust between the two and being sincere with each other, whatever the type of relationship it is, friends with rights, something sporadic, asking for feedback can help us improve and know what the other person thinks after making love with us.

Reflect

It is important for each person after having sex to take a few moments to reflect on how they have felt with that person. Listening to yourself first is the first step in making any kind of decision in life. Not only should we reflect on the meeting, but on how the whole before and after has gone, if we have felt comfortable at all times, if there is something that has bothered us a bit - a comment, an attitude, etc.- We have been able to comment on it. It is important to assess the encounter holistically.

Ask for privacy

Privacy is something that should be taken for granted, but, unfortunately, it is something that in many cases is not done is to respect the privacy of both. That is, what has happened between you is something that stays between you. Be careful, this does not mean that you cannot tell your friends that you have spent the night with someone, but it is not necessary to give details of what has been done or not done. No one is a trophy for anyone, sexuality is an intimate part of each personand that also when you maintain relationships with the other person you also involve the intimacy of that person. Sharing the intimacies that you have made with another person without their consent is a lack of respect towards that person. If you do not want this to happen and you sense that this may happen, do not hesitate to ask that what has happened between you stay with you. If you feel that the other person may not be very clear about this, it is important to make it clear.

Calibrate the situation

It should be noted that each encounter also has its particularity, not with all people there is an equal bond and that must also be valued to know how to act after maintaining relationships. To know how to act later, you must also assess how the meeting was and what you expected from it.

Practice empathy

Whether it was a one-night stand or something else, you always have to show empathy and respect for the other person, since you have just experienced an intimate moment for both of you, even though it was simply a bummer. It does not hurt to ask how the other person is doing or simply be receptive to any concerns or things they have to tell you.

Take initiative

A very frequently asked question is how long does it take for a person to call after having sex. Each person is different and will depend to a great extent on the experience lived and the intention of continuing to maintain contact with you or not. Anyway, if you want to contact him or her, you can take the initiative.

Once you have assessed the previous points, you can assess whether or not to write to the other person again and in what way is better or for what purpose you want to send the message. For this it is very important that before picking up the mobile and writing, you gauge how the meeting was, how it happened and how it was both the pre and the post.

What to write to a man or a woman after making love? Based on all this, we can send a message of: "Would you like to meet again?", Or a simple: "How are you?" to start conversation. If you prefer. You can also write something like "The other night I had a great time, I hope to see you again."

Give space

Sometimes things get too hasty, it is important that when calibrating the situation we also think about the other person and how they may feel and we can even ask them if they feel comfortable talking to us. Even so, it is important not to monopolize the other person with constant messages saying to meet again or as it is, sometimes we also have to give space to the other person and let it be the one who shows interest in us.

To clear doubts

Sometimes, the encounter between two people can generate doubts about what it has meant and you may see that their actions after having maintained relationships are not coherent or are not what you expected.

Perhaps previously he was very affectionate or when you finished maintaining relationships you slept hugging and now it seems as if none of these moments exist. What does it mean when a person hugs you to sleep after making love? The fact of sleeping hugged after having relationships can be associated with the different hormones secreted during the relationship that can make a person show more affective attitudes, as is the case of oxytocin or the love hormone that helps improve our state of encouragement and also to form emotional bonds. After having relationships, more oxytocin is found in the brain and that can make people engage in more loving behaviors to bond.

It is important even so, that if you have noticed a radical change in the other person and that has bothered you or made you feel bad, let them know and try to ask for an explanation or give your point of view on the subject, do not be afraid to Facing what has made you feel this attitude, the other person must be aware of how it makes their actions feel.

This article is merely informative, in Psychology-Online we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

If you want to read more articles similar to How to act with a person after having sex, we recommend that you enter our Sexology category.

Bibliography

• Morgado Bernal, I. (2015). Emotions in the development of virtues. Educational Participation , 4 (6), 47-50.